Sunday, September 23, 2012

Living on the Edge - watching "The Master"

I came to a few realizations today during and after watching the movie, “The Master.” Not sure which I want to go into first so I’ll start with me.

First of all “The Master” is a film starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquin Phoenix.  Hoffman plays a compelling, crazy ass writer that starts his own cult. His followers call him “The Master.”  Phoenix plays a broken WWII crazy ass vet who, at times, falls under his spell. I won’t give any spoilers as to why he could possibly be called “The Master” as well.  Upon leaving the theater my jaws were sore because I’d spent much of the time grinding my teeth. Watching the birthing of a cult, which is the beginning of any mainstream religion, is as disturbing as organized religion itself. What is most troubling to me though is that I realized I have so much in common with not only followers of cults, but the cult leaders themselves.

I am not a "normal" person. I just can't live a "normal” life, not for long anyway. I dread the thought of a 9-5 job, marriage, a white picket fence and bonuses at Christmas. I can't do it, I tried, I really did. I’m only a woman looking for where she fits in. I’ve lived half of a century and still don’t know where that is. It’s not that I don’t know what I want to do when I grow up. I’m grown and want nothing to do with that “American Dream”.

On the topic of that other “American Dream," the one where you get anything you want- I’ll let George Carlin fill you in on that one. While it’s a very good point that I completely agree with, it isn’t the one I’m making here.

Who decided that a matchbox house, disposals and Father Knows Best,  are what is normal, acceptable, and virtuous anyway? Who is that elusive “they” that decided that hopping trains and sleeping on park benches was unacceptable, unworthy, despicable and owning a house in the suburbs was the proper, correct, moral and valuable life to lead? Why is there only one way to live? What prick made this rule?

As I’m writing this I realize that for some people they do want that dream and can’t attain it. Others, like me, can attain and have had it but threw it away.

This is more difficult than I realized so I’ll post

More later -